In Operation Lululemon I shared the tale of a girl who got an awesome Lululemon hoodie for Christmas from her super sweet girlfriend. This was both wonderful and humbling at the same time. Wonderful, because the hoodie was awesome. Humbling, because the damn thing just wouldn’t zip up.
Every time I put this jacket on I felt like Chris Farley was taunting me with his song Fat Guuuy in a Little Coaaat …
I was pretty bummed out about it but in order to make light of the situation my husband and I had made a bet. If I could zip the hoodie up by Valentine’s Day then we would go on a shopping trip… to Lulu.
I was super excited for this day to come but I was also really nervous. I had made this bet public, what happens if this doesn’t pan out the way I wanted it to? I could just envision myself proudly zipping up the hoodie and doing a little dance. Then hearing the zipper split apart as waves of belly rolls broke free.
This is what I looked like in the jacket six weeks ago…
This is what it looked like today…
I was so excited that I could not only zip it up but that it looked good too!
That didn’t stop me from being a little nervous about the shopping trip. Shopping hasn’t really been my favorite thing since having Penelope. I have yet to wear a pair of pants that didn’t have an elastic waist band. I haven’t gone on a real shopping trip since I was seeking out maternity clothes at Motherhood.
I was fully prepared to go to Lululemon and make fun of myself by trying on clothes that looked hideous on me. I was going to show my rolls in all of their glory and laugh about it. This all would have been a lie. I would have gone home and cried afterward…
But today is Valentine’s Day and I didn’t want to ruin it by feeling ugly.
I don’t know what I was thinking but before I knew it I was digging out the hideous false eyelashes that I wore with my Halloween costume four years ago and I was glueing them to my eyelids in desperation. I also opted for hot pink lipstick that I bought on a whim about a year ago but have yet to wear.
I can’t give you a good reason for my actions. I think maybe I was hoping to place the focus on my face instead of on my body. That way when I was in the dressing room and I saw the fat on my body screaming at me through too tight clothing I could get distracted by the face that was staring back at me.
The only thing I managed to accomplish was to transform Chris Farley into Chris Farley in drag.
I could feel the weight of the eyelashes pulling my left eyelid lower than my right. I almost ripped them off in the car but I told myself that it was Valentine’s Day and I was just being festive by wearing them.
We drove to Cherry Creek which is a fun part of Denver to do our shopping. Plus, Cherry Cricket was nearby and I planned on drowning my failure in a massive cheat day hamburger… and a cold beer.
As we walked up to the store I could see the clothing calling out to me. I couldn’t help but get excited. I wanted to wear that stuff SO. BAD.
As soon as we walked through the door the sales ladies were so accommodating. I told them that I had just lost a little weight and I was rewarding myself. They helped me dig through the biggest size that they had, size 12, and filled up a dressing room full of possibilities.
(Did you know that they have pants that are supposed to support your muscles during high impact workouts and that they help prevent you from getting so sore??? True story.)
I stepped in the dressing room while Brent and Penelope waited outside for me. I took a deep breath and got ready for the disappointment…
… but it never came.
I didn’t look like a fitness model or anything but I actually had a lot of options to choose from. There wasn’t one pair of pants that didn’t fit great. I’m definitely not ready for the skimpier tank tops but I know that at some point this summer I will be. I had to choose between shorts or full length pants or knee-length pants… I was so excited!
As I was walking out of the dressing room the sales lady asked me if I had found something that I liked and I said yes. She said that she was going to give it to me for free…
WHAT?! Back up a minute… free?
She told me that they chose me to be a product tester. She said that they meet up with their designers on a regular basis to discuss what is and isn’t working with their current designs. They randomly choose people to test out their merchandise and then they go over the feedback that they have recieved in order to better their products.
I wanted to cry… you would have thought she had handed me a Grammy.
The whole experience was ten times better than I could have ever imagined. Since they were giving me the pants I got to pick out another jacket.
Here’s the outfit as a whole…
And guess what… this jacket is a size 10.
When we got done shopping Brent and I headed to our Valentine lunch date. I was so excited about what just went down that I could hardly eat my burger. I told Brent that this was the BEST DAY EVER and he gave me a funny look.
That’s when he reminded me that I have given birth to two beautiful daughters and I have gotten married… “so maybe it wasn’t the best day ever, right???”
I couldn’t help but laugh at him. He was right.
So maybe today wasn’t the best day EVER. But it was a really, REALLY great day.
Now I’ve got my sights set on a pair of shorts… if I lose twenty more pounds they’re mine.