Lungs on Fire

I was mean to a bunny today. This bunny to be exact…

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 And now I feel like a jerk.

It all started when I walked outside to admire my flowers in the yard and noticed that Mr. Cute Fuzzy Pants decided to go ahead and make a meal out of my daylilies.

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Big mistake buddy… big mistake.

I pulled out the big guns and got to work spraying liquid fence and sprinkling Uncle Ian’s Repellent all over the place.

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Let me give you some advice if you plan on using either of these products. Make sure it’s not windy outside. The Liquid Fence smells like all kinds of bodily fluids that one should never have to smell and Uncle Ian’s is comprised of a mixture of things but is most predominantly made of cayenne pepper.

How do I know?

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I decided to get down low and pick some weeds right after sprinkling it, just in time for a big gust of wind to blow it right in my face. I spent the next ten minutes gag/coughing and sneezing my brain out.

Why couldn’t the bunny just eat the stupid weeds instead of my prized flowers? Then I could skip the mean peppery tactics and he could enjoy a delicious meal while I avoided a horrific dose of karma.

After I got done sprinkling that crap all over the flowers I had made my way over to the strawberries to make sure they were safe too. That’s when I found this… (cue the dramatic soap opera music).

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What… you don’t see anything? Well that’s because Scout dug up my strawberry plant the little asshole. He knew he was in trouble when I called his name…

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“Whatever you do, don’t make eye contact…”

I was SO mad at him but he’s just so stinkin’ cute that I had the hardest time not snuggling with him. I would forget and give him kisses and then remember and glare at him. He probably thinks I’m pregnant again, poor guy.

My gardening disasters weren’t quite over yet. Shortly after I discovered the shredded strawberries the gate door broke off…. just snapped.

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Now poor Scout doesn’t have any privacy…

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(FYI: I didn’t plan on taking a picture of him pooping in the yard he just happened to plan it perfectly.)

Despite the gardening fiascos I still had a good day because I got to do another crossfit workout. This is only my second one since I threw my back out. My lungs are still burning but I don’t know if it’s from the bunny pepper or the workout.

Here’s what we did…

WOD

(workout of the day)

LIFT:

The lift of the day was the Press. We warmed up adding weight until we found a decently heavy weight in order to do three sets of five.

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We did a few more reps with kettle bells dangling off of the bar using resistance bans.

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(My grip was off so I got a little crooked on this one.)

Then he had us take all of the weights off and do as many reps as possible using only the bar until failure for three rounds resting 20 seconds in between. This KILLED my arms!

METCON:

(short intense workout)

We had to do five sprint rounds of Farmer’s Carries using the wide grip things that wrap about the dumb bells…

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Battling Ropes (10 per arm)

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 Prowler Pushes down…

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…and back.

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My fastest time was 39 seconds. Brent made fun of me when I asked him why we weren’t doing the prowler pushes with weight. This was supposed to be done as fast as possible and after 5 rounds I was glad there wasn’t any weight on it. Like I said, my lungs were-a-burning.

This workout was also kind of a big deal because it was the first time that I worked out in a tank top without looking like a can of biscuits that had exploded every where. I’ve only tried this once before and it wasn’t pretty. Since I’m all about self-deprecation I invite you to look back and compare by clicking here… you’re welcome 😉

The Back Up Plan For a Veggie Funk

Guess what?! My biceps hate me.

But that’s okay because when I braided my hair in the mirror today I saw them winking at me.

Good times… I can’t wait to be buff.

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I’ve been talking to some friends from Crossfit Littleton who are doing a Whole 30 challenge for the month of May. They are super excited about it. If you want to join them you can join their Facebook page May 2013 Whole 30… You’ve been officially invited, I double checked.

I’ve been thinking about it all weekend and despite a little peer pressure I’ve come to the conclusion that I’m not going to do it. This officially makes me the not cool kid.

I’m sure it’s great and if you give it a try you will benefit from it. But it’s just not for me.

You can do anything for thirty days but I think it would screw with my head. I’m kind of a perfectionist… the problem is I screw up all of the time. Can you imagine the turmoil this causes?!

This is how the Whole 30 would go for me…

It doesn’t start until May 1st which is Wednesday so I would spend the next few days leading up to that point gorging myself on whatever I felt I was going to be deprived of, even if I didn’t want to eat it. I’d gain a good 5 pounds and already be worse off than if I had never done the damn thing.

I would be all gung ho on Wednesday until I screwed up three hours into it. I would eat like crap for the rest of the day because I was going to have a redo the next day. But then I would screw up again…

You get the point.

I don’t fall off wagons, they just completely fall apart. Then not only do I have to get back on the wagon but I have to rebuild the whole damn thing too.

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This might sound like a defeatist attitude but it is my reality. We all have to acknowledge our limitations. Taking away food options just isn’t my thang. This whole journey is about finding balance. I can’t tip too far either direction or my whole equilibrium will be thrown off.

That being said, I do plan on tightening things up a bit.

Instead of taking things away I am adding things in the hopes of crowding out the crap. I did this back in late February when I did the Veggie Challenge. During this time I had to drink a ton of water and eat veggies with breakfast, lunch and dinner. It was a four day challenge and it worked.

I’m not much of a meal planner because I don’t like feeling like I’m stuck eating something I’m not in the mood for…I’m a brat, we know this.

However, I do have a few back up recipes on hand just in case I get in a veggie funk…

1. Chicken Parmesan Zucchini Meatballs on top of zucchini noodles and marinara sauce. (I bought a zucchini spiralizer and I’m dying to use it.)

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2. Raw Kale and Brussel Sprouts Salad with Tahini-Maple Dressing. I have tahini in my pantry. I have no idea how it got there.

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3. Cauliflower Crust Pizza– This just looked too yummy to pass up.

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I’ll probably be eating several Whole 30/paleo approved meals but I’ll also be eating my signature afternoon snack of greek yogurt, strawberries and chia seeds. I eat it. Every. Day. I love it!

With that said I better hit the hay, I’ve got some fat to lose and some muscles to build.

What are you doing to get ready for the upcoming summer season?